Gil from RealWeegieMidgetReviews was kind enough to mention my blog on her site and set down a list of questions for me to answer.

1. Have you ever met a celebrity somewhere random?

Not really. Though I did once serve Alan Titchmarsh when I was waiting tables a few years ago. Very charming. Can see why all the ladies like him.

2. Have you ever had a celebrity write to you in response to a fan letter?

No. Have never written a fan letter. Did get a thank you from Robin Askwith on Twitter for identifying an actor in a photo he’d met briefly in a bar in 1986. Turned out it was former Colbys star Joseph Campanella.

3. What’s your favourite advert with an actor or actress?

I guess you could make a case The Hire (2000) shorts starring Clive Owen are adverts as they were funded by BMW, but they feel more like short films with product placement which isn’t really the same. I remember seeing Brad Pitt in a Levi’s 501 ad back in 1990 and thinking he’ll do all right for himself.

4. If you could ghost-write a celebrity’s autobiography with their permission who would it be?

George Lazenby had a much more interesting career than people give him credit for. Becoming Bond (2017, Josh Greenbaum) was fine but didn’t seem have much interest in the man himself or his career after On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969, Peter Hunt). I’m fascinated by him quitting that role to make Universal Soldier (1971, Cy Endfield), an anti-war movie about a spy who drops out and starts hanging out with left-wing activists. I also feel the giallo Who Saw Her Die? ((Aldo Lado), co-starring with Angela Mao in the Hong-Kong martial arts movie Stoner (1974, Feng Huang), and Saint Jack (1979, Peter Bogdanovich) makes for an interesting 1970s’. There’s also the time he spent with Bruce Lee before his untimely death working on a proposed follow-up to Enter the Dragon (1973, Robert Clouse), and essentially playing Bond again on TV in Return of the Man From U.N.C.L.E and the Alfred Hitchcock Presents episode Diamonds Aren’t Forever. Mostly I just want to talk to him about his appearance on the fashion house/spy show Cover Up.

5. Have you ever been on telly or in a movie?

No.

6. Who was your first film or TV love?

I honestly can’t recall the first. It was so long ago. Probably Georgina Hayes on Grange Hill, or Abby on Howard’s Way.

7. You are allowed to snog, marry or avoid three movie or TV stars.. who are they?

I would prefer to avoid all TV and movie stars completely.

8. If you could give out an Oscar which category would it be for?

It would be a Lifetime Achievement Award for Albert Pyun.

9. Who would you like to accompany to the Oscars?

To be honest I prefer being at home and tweeting about them, but if I had to go I’d like to go with the guy from the law firm who’s responsible for keeping the envelopes with the names of the winners. I just want to see how stressful that job is now after the Warren Beatty/Faye Dunaway slip up a few years ago.

10. Which film would you watch again and again?

I will never grow tired of Deathstalker II (1987, Jim Wynorski).

11. What’s your favourite TV Movie?

A bleak but very funny production written by Alan Bennett for Screen Two called The Insurance Man (1986, Richard Eyre) which is loosely based on the life and work of Franz Kafka. The late Robert Hines stars as a young man living in pre-WWI Prague who develops a mysterious blue tinged skin infection on his chest while working in a factory and is sent to a government building to meet a clerk called Franz Kafka (Daniel Day-Lewis) to see if his condition makes him eligible for insurance. There he finds he’s one of many claimants waiting around the labyrinthian hallways, or being sent from one office to the next because they have the wrong form. All he wants to do is find out what’s wrong with him but his journey through the building turns into a nightmarish series of encounters with contemptuous bureaucrats and people who have become slightly unhinged by the whole experience. Made around the same time Day-Lewis broke through with My Beautiful Laundrette (1985, Stephen Frears), and A Room With A View (1985, James Ivory) and though he only appears in a few scenes he’s incredibly charismatic. I’m also very fond of a TV movie called Nick Knight (1989, Farhad Mann) starring Rick Springfield as a vampire cop in Los Angeles.